Lesbihonest…
This country would run a hell of a lot better if we just put Martha Stewart in charge of all of the things.
She is the master of taking crappy situations (your nasty azz kitchen, your nasty azz holidays) and making them f-a-n-c-y (sit yo fake Azz-elea down, Iggy)
girl looks like a less hot Casey Anthony
Also, unlike literally everyone in charge, she just
doesn’t.
give.
a.
f**k.
In a recent interview, Martha was asked about Gwyneth Paltrow. You know, that sad white girl who sells expensive crap in a magazine/website “Goop”–a total ripoff of what Martha has been doing since Oprah was some sad local TV news host.
laughing at your poverty!
On Gwyneth:
She just needs to be quiet. She’s a movie star. If she were confident in her acting, she wouldn’t be trying to be Martha Stewart.
Not only does Martha triple down on Gwyneth, she refers to HERSELF in the third person.
Martha doesn’t hold back though.
Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and author of “Lean In”, has been getting every famous female personality to endorse her philosophy that women should “lean in” at the workplace to break the glass ceiling for women.
Martha has no time for such trivial bullsh*t:
Stewart also scoffed at Sheryl Sandberg’s best-selling book “Lean In,” saying women should spend less energy fighting barriers in the workplace and be more entrepreneurial: “Too much time is spent . . . Isn’t ‘leaning in’ spending a lot of time? . . . I think being entrepreneurial is something women should strive for, rather than working up the corporate ladder.”
Do you watch Orange is the New Black?
Martha’s got something to say about that too:
They could have done that so much better. That girl” — referring to Taylor Schilling — “is not good enough, the lead actress,” Stewart grumps. “I met the real Piper [Kerman]. She was in prison either the same time or after me, and I talked to her about it.
Martha knows better about the REAL Orange is the New Black…cuz she was THERE.
Which is more than you weak losers watching OINTB on your Netflixes with a tub of ice cream and a bottle of White Zin can say.
Face it–Martha knows all, from setting table knives to sharpening a toothbrush into a knife.
She’s run a billion-dollar company, written more books than that Harry Potter chick, hosted more shows than there are Real Housewives franchises, and has sold more magazines than Oprah without even having to put her face on the cover of every issue.
hey look, she even let allowed her slave partner to be on this cover.
in the inside fold where no one looks.
She even did a special on the FDR Memorial in DC, taking viewers on a tour through the little-known Washington landmark with a discussion of FDR’s Four Freedoms speech:
In the future days, which we seek to make secure, we look forward to a world founded upon four essential human freedoms.
The first is freedom of speech and expression…
The second is freedom of every person to worship God in his own way…
The third is freedom from want…
The fourth is freedom from fear…
It was what she followed it up with, however, that drove the point home:
I wish somebody would give that speech right today. We need to hear it again.
From the big house to the White House.
Let’s make this happen.
