Look, if you’re a hot 33-year-old nurse, the last way you gotta get some D is drugging up one of your 60-year-old patients awaiting surgery and riding him into the sunset.
especially if you’re cute like this
But apparently–that happened.
A female nurse “initiated unsolicited sexual relations, including intercourse” with a hospitalized Illinois man who was awaiting a heart transplant, according to a lawsuit filed Monday against the woman and the hospital where her employment was later terminated.
First of all, what does a 33 year old nurse have to gain out of this? What is the likelihood that 33 year old nurses, pretty little things in uniform, get off by humping an old dude that looks like a reject extra from the Sopranos?
contain your orgasms
For sh*t’s sake, the guy looks like he runs a Philly cheese steak stand. We’re not talking about George Clooney here.
Second of all, there’s this juicy detail:
Cantone, whose wife Laura is co-plaintiff in the lawsuit, charges that Shaper, seen at right, “had a propensity to initiate unauthorized physical contact with patients.”
Mhmm.
So what are we betting that this dude’s wife found out he got a little nookie in the hospital and he needed an alibi?
Now things are starting to make a lot more sense.
But third of all–the chick had to consent with this.
At some point or another, her floodgates opened for Fat Paulie and she couldn’t stand it anymore.
Why she couldn’t have gone and picked up some mozzarella at the grocery store and put some Dean Martin in the stereo is beyond me, but to each her own.
Also, she’s been fired, so tell your uncle that no, he can’t get his prostate surgery at Oak Lawn Hospital.
ATTENTION: THIS IS NOT A REAL NURSE
